Resurfacing

Palace Hotel, San Francisco, November 2006
Originally uploaded by suzipaw.

As in coming up for air? That's what I thought at first about this blog--that it would be a breath, a sigh of how much I missed you, how I felt a happy space of anticipation around this post. But now it feels like a shaping and smoothing of the sharp angles of my life to fit in, or to blunt the hard reality of my new schedule. I'm just trying to elicit sympathy, I know. I'll stop now.

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So the swanky conference last week was considered a success, but I think, back at the office, we're all just relieved that it's over. Everyone in attendance seemed very…tense. Like there was a lot at stake, and I guess there was. Sorta. I had people pleading with me, disappointed in me, disbelieving that I would turn them away, trying to charm or entertain me for a pass, some even screaming at me in anger. And I just dealt with a small subset of participants. I came to seriously doubt my powers of communication, and though I don't believe much in god, I was seriously thinking that Mercury was in deep retrograde. The event had that tech boom, late 1998ish feel to it--people with money hanging out in an expensive hotel eating sculpted food designed to mask the reality of a rubber chicken dinner, sniffing scented oxygen at late night parties, and trying to double dip their pound cake in the five-tier chocolate fountain while propping their feet up on chic white leather ottomans and watching the digerati hold forth for three days. Am I making any sense at all? I don't think so.

I do think I'll be more sensical after three days at my mom's over Thanksgiving. Propping my feet up on a regular ottoman in front of a fire stuffed from esophagus to duodenum with homemade trimmings will hopefully chase all of these dotcom nightmares away.

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What else? I posted a few new pictures. I miraculously found my camera battery charger in the hall closet where I had put it for safe keeping during the carpet cleaning lo these many months ago but couldn't find it there the first five times I searched for it in that very closet. M is still greatly enjoying his teaching duties. We actually went out to a movie theater to watch Borat last weekend and laugh heartily yet guiltily.

*****

And now it's getting late and I'm not feeling any more clearheaded or creative. It's been an evening of laundry, work email, blogging, and I should drag my scattered ass to bed. More posts sooner rather than later, I hope. I missed you, though, please remember that.