Ahhhctober

Fall has come to Sonoma County. Huge trucks bearing grapes and stacks of wine barrels are cruising the highways. We had our first sudden rain shower yesterday, healing just a bit the huge dry cracks in the earth and bringing out the wonderful smells of dry grass now not as parched and resulting in the first set of muddy paw prints on the carpet of the season. I wore a jacket to work yesterday. The dog walking while it's light window is closing. September's energy bill was actually fairly reasonable, but that will change this month--we'll open up the house a bit once it warms up today and run the heater for a while to clear it out. I sure could use it this morning.

*****

Ahhhdulthood

A friend at work and I stayed a little late yesterday, chatting about growing up, taking responsibility, being homebodies, and life on communes. She's much younger than I am and could, conceivably, haha be my daughter in an alternate universe. She grew up on a religious commune of some sort one county north. She had a story about how her parents had promised never to ground her, but once they moved off the commune and into the burbs, their stance on that changed--among many other things too, no doubt--they felt they had to conform to the neighborhood norms, she said. It made me think of how different norms were, and are now. Some of those commune activities definitely wouldn't have been ok in the burbs, and definitely would not be ok now. Looking back through adult eyes, I can understand that but I also think society today is much more paranoid and protective--I'm sure that's a rant others have articulated much better than I ever could.

We also discussed one of the definitions of adulthood: being ok just sitting around and talking. Visiting with others when I was really young usually meant activity: going into a bedroom to play, or maybe a game of tag or hide-and-seek or throwing statues (is that a game anyone else played or did my babysitter just make that up?). Older, it meant sneaking away to a bedroom to talk about doing illicit things, or sitting on the curb waiting for some activity to take place--which I guess was a bridge to the adult sitting around and talking, minus the unbearable presence of adults, of course. But now I really enjoy the talking part, that's activity enough for me.

I know that at this family reunion next summer, it will be inescapable--I'll be one of the adults (dults, we used to call them), no longer one of the kids. So many of the next generation kids in the family are actually young adults now, becoming "real" people, I'll be forced to cede the kid category. Yes, yes, I know, I'm not going gently into that good night. Yet, anyway. (I note that I'm still thinking of being categorized as an adult in the future tense, hm…)

I'm sure planning this family reunion at a place pivotal to my childhood, my recent birthday (one of M's gifts to me is the Tom Petty album that was a big part of the soundtrack of my senior year in high school), and my visit to NY have made me even more thoughtful of time passed and passing. Many tales of commune life will come up during the reunion next summer. Gotta be proficient with the movie camera by then, certainly. I also don't want to only sit around and talk, or be on the outside, observing with my camera--I'd like to come up with games and activities that we can do together to break the ice a bit, to get to know these new adults for who they are, all on their own. And they're probably not ready to sit around and talk--yet, anyway.

On the way to work yesterday I stopped at a little java hut to treat myself to a latte, and it was so nice to hear the banter between the older guy behind me and the younger guy behind the counter. They were just talking about fishing but they were obviously enjoying each other's company. And that's one thing to like about being the age I am--appreciating the friendships I have in both generational directions now, free from the authority that age sometimes imposes or imposes upon.

*****

I'm looking forward to a nice weekend. I'm going up to M's school with him to work while he studies, which is why I'm blogging now--I'll be sick of my laptop later. Tonight (after a try at a nap, no doubt, I'm up early) we're seeing a band at Rancho Nicasio, the Hacienda Brothers--a friend knows one of the guys in the band. Tomorrow it's the Harvest Fair, including the sheep dog trials, which is always excellent entertainment. I may even do some wine tasting and take in the pig races...